Preparing Your Toddler for a New Baby

Inside: Help your toddler adjust to a new baby with these simple tips for a smooth transition and a happy sibling bond!

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Welcoming a New Baby: Preparing Your Toddler for the Big Change

Bringing a new baby into the family is an exciting milestone, but if you have a toddler, it also comes with a mix of emotions. Will they feel left out? Will they struggle with the change? I had all of these worries running through my mind as we prepared for our baby’s arrival. I wanted to make sure my son, Tristan,  felt secure, loved, and ready for this big transition.

Since he was so attached to me, we fully expected jealousy. He always wanted mommy for everything—bath time, bedtime, even getting his snacks. Anytime my husband tried to step in, he’d protest, “No, mommy’s gonna do it!” It wasn’t that he didn’t love his dad; he just felt most comfortable with me. So, I knew we had to start preparing him early.

For months before the baby arrived, I focused on building solid routines to create stability in his world. I wanted him to have something familiar to count on each day, even if mommy’s hands were full. Along with routines, we also used other simple strategies in hopes to make this transition easier—and they worked better than we ever imagined!

Preparing Your Toddler for a New Baby

Establishing Strong Routines Before Baby Arrives

Toddlers thrive on predictability. A solid routine gives them a sense of security, especially when big changes are coming. As with anything new, I did my due diligence doing loads of research on the topic of creating routines for toddlers. 

I found a lot of things that I liked, but unfortunately, they wouldn’t fit our lifestyle or schedules. On the other hand, I also found a lot of things that I liked, but my toddler didn’t take to them or like them how I had imagined he would. You have to come into this process with patience and realize there will be trials, errors and lots of tweaking when it comes to creating a good routine. 

What it really came down to was before our new baby arrived, I focused on creating daily activities Tristan could look forward to—morning baskets, free play, snack time, field trips to the library or store, nap times, etc. I believe knowing what to expect each day has helped ease the transition. Not to mention, having a solid routine in place has also significantly reduced the number of tantrums we see. 

If you would like to read further into our daily routine, I highly recommend you check out my article My Toddler’s Daily Routine.

Encouraging Open-Ended Play to Foster Independence

Tristan has always been attached to me from the start, I felt responsible for his lack of being able to play more independently. We had no clue how we were going to get him interested and comfortable playing by himself all of the sudden. I did tons of research on Pinterest and spent a lot of time reading other mom blogs regarding encouraging open ended play. I wanted to make sure my Tristan had engaging activities to focus on while I cared for the new baby. What I found was open-ended toys like blocks, reusable puffy stickers, and reusable mess free art activities kept him busy. 

I also discovered the wonderful world of sensory bins! Sensory bins led us to this amazing sensory table on Amazon, I have become obsessed. Once you have it set up, it can keep a toddler busy for hours. The best part? You can shake things up with different themes to keep it interesting to them longer. It can be a little costly initially, but once you start to gather supplies and build your collection, the different themes you can set up become endless. I love setting the sensory table up for holidays like Valentines Day and Saint Patrick’s Day, I cannot wait to do our Easter themes! 

Learning how to play more independently not only helped him adjust but also boosted his creativity. For more ideas on open-ended activities check out my article 5 Screen-Free Activities for Toddlers!

Using a Baby Doll to Introduce the Concept

I don’t remember how the idea of using a baby doll came about to show Tristan what life with the new baby was going to be like, but it was probably one of the most beneficial things to prepare him for what was next.

Two weeks before my due date, we practiced baby care with a doll. We showed him where the baby would sleep, how diaper changes worked, how mommy would be feeding her, and what to expect at different times of the day coinciding with his routine. This hands-on approach made the idea of a sibling feel more real.

I showed him that he would need to be very gentle as new babies are fragile. We let him practice things like getting close to see the baby but not touching or shoving toys in their face. We practiced using quiet inside voices around the baby when it was supposed to be “sleeping,” much like we do when we take a field trip to the library!

If you don’t have time to set up a routine or focus on independent play, this would be the one tip or piece of advice I urge you to practice before the arrival of a new baby.

Making the Baby Real Before Birth

Every day, we let him touch and talk to my belly. We’d say, “Your baby sister is in there!” We were also sure to use her name often, so this would make her more real as a person to him. Once the baby arrives, they aren’t just going to hear “sister” or “brother,” they are going to hear the baby being referred to by name, so it is very important to get them used to their name. 

This simple routine of having him feel her in my belly, sing her a song or even just talking to her, really helped him build a connection before she even arrived.

Helping Him Prepare for Mommy’s Changing Role

We gently prepared him for all of the special things that would be changing that he was so used to doing with mommy. It honestly made me so nervous and made me feel so heartbroken for him before she even arrived. 

I would lay him down for a nap and snuggle up to him and say “When baby Ruthie comes, mommy won’t be able to lay with you until you fall asleep anymore. You will have to be a big boy like Bubba and lay by yourself to go to sleep, mommy will need to be with baby Ruthie.” I used phrases like “She is going to be so little and she will need to have mommy help her with everything because she is a little baby, but you are a big boy now, you do such a good job doing ______ by yourself.” Little things like this encouraged small steps toward independence, we would try practicing certain things together. 

The biggest motivator when teaching him things that would change once she arrived was the amount of praise I gave him for attempting to do things on his own. 

A Beautiful Surprise: His Reaction to the New Baby

We truly expected jealousy and extreme heartbreak once she arrived. Instead, we got love. It made my mama heart melt into 1,000,000 little pieces I was so shocked, but so very proud. The first time he heard her cry; he cried too overwhelmed with emotion. I even got this incredibly sweet moment on camera! Our whole extended family was worried how he would take the new baby, so they asked if we would record it for them. Daddy went to change sissy’s diaper in front of Tristan for the first time, of course he was so curious he was right there next to daddy watching, I thought it was cute, so I whipped out my camera and I am so glad I did! 

When Big Brothers Heart Broke for Her

She started to cry, and he looked at his daddy like “what are you doing to her??” then he looked over at me and his bottom lip immediately curled over and he was visibly concerned and feeling her emotions for her. It shocked me! I caressed his face and wiped away REAL TEARS he was crying for her. I put my phone down and just gave him the biggest hug, I have probably ever given him. We told him how proud we were of him for being such a good big brother and being so strong now that she is here. I can’t believe I captured that beautiful moment for both of them to share for a lifetime. 

Our entire family was touched by it. We all found ourselves watching it over and over again. The proud mom I am, I decided to share it with everyone on my socials because it was too sweet of a moment not to share. The video ended up going viral and has almost 3 million views! Check it out here, but be prepared to cry ugly tears. It’s so precious.

Now, he continues to be the best big brother. He sings to soothe her, holds her hand, and patiently waits when I’m busy. When he needs me, he sweetly asks, “Mommy, can you put baby Ruthie down so you can hold me now?” All of this hard work preparing for her arrival has definitely paid off.

Conclusion

Preparing your toddler for a sibling makes a world of difference. With love, patience, and small changes, the transition can be smoother than expected. Encouraging independence while nurturing their sibling bond creates a beautiful, lasting connection.

📖 Want more tips on intentional parenting? Check out my posts on screen-free activities and healthy family routines to support toddler growth. Did you do anything special to prepare your toddler for a new baby? I would love to hear about it in the comments below!